I had the serious misfortune to be driving this Valentine's Day,minding my own business and jamming out to 103.5 Soul Classics,when BAM -- out of nowhere the disc jockey extended what waspreviously only a smug couple day to an entire weekend.
As if you smug couples weren't satisfied with just one day ofexpensive gifts, chick flicks and overindulgence in chocolate, youhad to ruin my whole weekend. OK, so maybe it's time to take myXanax, but can you just give us singletons a break?
The Valentine's Day tradition supports what I've thought allalong -- for the most part, romance is dead.
You smug couples had a day devoted entirely to you, and what doyou do with it? Most people I talked to went to dinner and/or amovie and nothing else special. Even the ones who went out of theirway were simply acting on cue.
While some people still practice random acts of romanceregularly, most people get stuck in the gelatinous muck of dailyroutines and cute little pecks hello and goodbye.
It's no wonder the divorce rate is so high. Why would you wantto brave uncharted, exciting territory when you have yournon-glamorous, completely-discovered,couldn't-be-mysterious-unless-they-turned-out-to-be-a secret-agentsweetie at home?
I will not rant without offering an alternative though. Myromantic suggestion to those in the Grand Canyon of relationshipruts is put all shame aside. It's amazing what people will do whenthey stop fearing what others think.
While in a crowd, don't be afraid to go retro and grab the oneyou love with reckless abandon and kiss them like the world isabout to end. Politely explain to gawkers that you are rehearsingfor Gone with the Wind and give a slight bow.
While this may be a bit drastic for some, the principle is stillvalid. Even if in private you quit worrying if your love will thinkyou are stupid or silly, you could actually find yourself caught upin romance.
Romance has become seriously misunderstood. It's not flowers andcandy once a year and making love the same way every Friday.Romance is expressing your feelings with creativity and withoutlimits.
Barring other circumstances, if a marriage is sour because thecouple says they are no longer in love, it is because they lost theromance. Simply having a date night and saying "I love you" everyday means nothing. It becomes routine. And like that song on theradio you once loved but now can't stand because of sheerrepetition, a relationship can get tired as well.
Thanks again for the e-mails. It's tamore@memphis.edu if you haveanything you want to share, I still want to hear more about onlinedating and friendship turned to love. I already have some greatstories to tell.
